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Commitments worth making to your kids during your divorce

If you and your spouse have decided to divorce, you may be questioning your judgment right now. You may be wondering if you are making the right decision and you may even be questioning your choice to wed your spouse in the first place. It can be understandably difficult to make new commitments while you are questioning whether or not you can be trusted to make ones that are sound. However, it is important to consider making some specific commitments to your children during your divorce process, even if doing so makes you a bit uneasy.

Children and teens crave stability and reassurance during times of upheaval, even if they vocalize that they do not need these things from you. As a result, it can be beneficial if you let your children know explicitly and repeatedly that you are committing to certain behaviors and approaches moving forward.

You know your children best. Therefore, you almost certainly will know what kinds of commitments your children may uniquely benefit from. However, you likely cannot go “wrong” with committing to love them and care for them moving forward, to remain invested in their lives, to listen to them and to consider their needs.

You may wish to commit to remaining a family or to remain open to their questions. Or you may wish to commit specific things that they will uniquely appreciate, like honoring a specific family tradition. As you vocalize these commitments, consider letting your children know that because you are human your efforts will not always be perfect but that you will always give them the best of who you are at any given time.

Source: The Huffington Post, “17 Things Your Kids Will Appreciate Hearing After You Drop the Divorce Bomb,” Jackie Pilossoph, June 25, 2015

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